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Posts with tag valentinesday

Rosez ar red, Blizzard es blu, Ork rite luv poetry just fur yu!

Reader Chris emailed this to me-- he and his guildmates in Gnomeburgers on Suramar-H were running around doing the Valentine's Day quests together. One of them, an Orc named Gruulok, punched out a few lines of Orc poetry, and they are hilarious. (Yes, I know the image to the right is a Night Elf, not an Orc, but didn't you ever learn that Love is blind?)

Sure, you might think that Orcs aren't very good at poetry, but I've heard my own Orc speak a few lines himself-- something about coming from the Orcs, eating with spoons and forks, and he loves to eat his pork. Gruulok's poetry is perhaps the best love poetry ever written in... well, I'm not quite sure what language this is. Orcish? If you're feeling a little Hordie (get it?) this evening, feel free to share these lines with your sweetie, and have a great Valentine's Day.

Tru Ork luv leevez skarz an brewzez, an eben browken nowzez,
but vilent luv iz much mor fun den duzenz o steenky rowzez.

Wen hartz brake an teerz duz fawl, datz wen tru luv endzez,
but watch yerz bak cuz Orky gurlz nowz how ta take de vengenz.

Continue reading Rosez ar red, Blizzard es blu, Ork rite luv poetry just fur yu!

Guards bugged in Silvermoon City

As a sidenote to the Valentine's Day guide from earlier: Don't even bother to try the Love quests in the new cities. As Memory from Scilla notes, the guards there are completely bugged-- in Silvermoon, guards talk about Stormwind (I even, as a Blood Elf, had one try to speak Dwarven to me).

Now, Drysc says it's a known problem that has to do with the event itself, so if the problem isn't fixed soon, it'll go away for sure by Thursday, since that's when the Love event ends. And there's no real point to tooling around looking for love in the expansion cities anyway-- Kwee Q. Peddlefeet isn't there at all (because not all players, I suppose, have the expansion, and that would mess up the popularity contest, since all the rewards are city specific). So this isn't exactly the end of the world, even though when you get Heartbroken, it may seem like it.

But for the moment, good luck trying to find your way around an expansion city you don't know. I was trying to find the Mage trainer in Silvermoon, and had to just give up and run back to the newbie area to train my new spells.

Sex in the Undercity: A guide to finding love in Azeroth


The Valentine's Day event started last week. Love, exciting and new, is in the air in Azeroth, and I sent my undead rogue, Punishment of Thunderhorn, to go looking for love in all the wrong places. He didn't exactly make time with Sylvanas Windrunner (she's such a banshee), but he was able to form a real odd couple.

You can see his journey in the Gallery below, and get a firsthand look at just how love works in Azeroth. The event ends Thursday, so go through the guide below to see the ins and outs of finding your soulmate (or mates, as the case may be), and then get to it! Love is in the air!

Gallery: Sex in the Undercity

Hi, I'm Punishment!First, Some CologneIn the UC (Don't Call It That)Flirting with LadyPlease Baby Please


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