
Daniel Howell contributes BigRedKitty, a column with strategies, tips and tricks for and about the Hunter class, sprinkled with a healthy dose of completely improper, sometimes libelous, personal commentary.
LF Tank and Healer for Heroic Shattered Halls.
LF Tank and Healer for Black Morass.
LF Tank and Healer for Gruul's Lair PUG and good to go.
LF Tank and Healer to raid Undercity or Hogger.
As a DPS-class, this is all we see in the Looking for Group channel, isn't it? It's just 10,000 warlocks and mages and rogues and hunters, all hoping that a tank and healer will consider us worthy of their glorified, sanctified presence. We prostrate ourselves, hoping they will let us get a little reputation and watch them get a new piece of gear, while we take home eleven pieces of Netherweave Cloth and a Large Prismatic Shard.
Well in WotLK, hunters are getting a huge present: the ability to have Pet Talent Points. Although the final names of the pet talent trees aren't chiseled in stone, the concept is that we will have a DPS Tree, a Tanking Tree, and a Utility Tree.
A basic glimpse in the WotLK-future would indicate that Marksman hunters could get a DPS-spec'd pet and do more DPS than a Beastmaster hunter currently can. That would make sense; we'd be fine with that. A Survivalist hunter could make a Utility pet. Would a Utility pet be like Robin to your Batman, dropping traps and able to Fear and put wickedly-cool debuffs on targets? Maybe, sounds like fun.
But what puts a shine on our gun is the idea of a Beastmaster hunter with a Tanking Pet. Can you imagine... a hunter's pet that could honestly tank a 5-man instance boss.
Yeah, baby. You sell that to us, Blizzard, and we're totally buying.
And the first time we ever mentioned this on our personal blog, the tank-lurkers erupted in a foaming blather of incoherent and monosyllabic outrage."Tanking is the hardest part of the game! If a hunter's pet can do my job, I'm rerolling Student and getting my f-ing associates degree."
That's right, the tankers were concerned they'd be out of a job, on the street, and relegated to a daily ritual of washing perfectly clean and untarnished shields. And we're here to tell you... we certainly hope that happens. Enjoy your NevrDull, fellas, and don't let that armor drag on the carpet on your way to Poly Sci 101 at your local community college.
Now that we're completely on the bandwagon of potentially eliminating the need for tanks until level 80 and the new 25-man raiding content, the Hunter-Pet World Domination Extravaganza has a new target in its sights.
LF Healer for Heroic Steamvaults... oh wait, never mind. Our Hunter has a Healing Pet.
The insanity that is Pet Talent Trees must be amplified, my fellow hunters. Give us a pet DPS Tree and bequeath unto our class a pet Tanking Tree, that's all gravy. But take the Utility Tree and round-file it. In its place...
In it's place, we need a pet Healing Tree.
That's right, we need a hunter-pet capable of healing a five-person group. And we've got the whole thing worked out!
First, we need a pet capable of doing healing spells. Unicorns, by Elune! Make unicorns pet-trainable in WotLK and we'll spec one in the pet Healing Tree.
The spiffy yet fictional pet Healing Tree gives our pet the ability to auto-target our party's tank and auto-cast heals when the tank's health drops. Our unicorn will have a bonus-to-healing aura, an auto-casting heal-over-time spell, a decurse, a quick-but-small heal spell, and a slow-but-big heal spell. When the hunter selects his pet's Healing Tree talents, the hunter is able to pick and choose which healing spells his pet unicorn can auto-cast . Simple, easy, fun to do.
A hunter's Ranged Attack Power would continue to buff his pet's spell damage, e.g. Wind Serpent's Lightning Breath, but through the use of the pet Healing Tree, RAP would also be able to buff a pet's bonus to healing. All the standard hunter-pet synergy would remain intact, but instead of your pet blasting away at the boss, your unicorn would stand by your side and drop heal-bombs on your tank and a Unicorn-Horn Blast of Tranquility over the entire party.
Can you smell all the Win here? Is there anybody out there who doesn't want a little Unicorn-Healing Love?
But of course there is one group who might have an issue here, who might have a major grievance to file with their union. That would be our sweet-smelling healers.
Just like the pet Tanking Tree will cause a massive resignation of tanks, the pet Healing Tree would turn all those Holy Priests into mana batteries and the Resto Druids into ferals. And when their cries crashed the forums and their rages obliterated our chat windows... we'd eat it up with crusty Italian bread dipped in oil and vinegar.
Mr. Holy Priest, do you want to know what it's like to sit outside of the Caverns of Time for three hours, trying to get into a single Black Morass run? Just wait until the pet Holy Tree is implemented and the pet unicorns replace boars as the Overpowered Pet of the Year.
LF3M, Fury Warrior and Shadow Priest need a hunter with either Tank or Healing pet to run anything they'd like. We're bored and lonely. Please, we used to be popular...




















Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
7-03-2008 @ 2:38PM
Vlatch said...
This is a fantastic tongue-in-cheek article about the future of huntaring. Thanks, BRK; I sincerely hope I'm not the only one who gets the humor.
Although I fear more than a few others will take offense ;)
Reply
7-03-2008 @ 2:42PM
Vanifae said...
I find this cute, I won't be out of a job but I hope the tanking tree is as good as it sounds.
7-03-2008 @ 4:12PM
Harmun said...
Heh, I loled :)
Hunter pets currently DPS in raids and tank for a solo hunter. I think a specialized pet will be able to do either a little better at the expense of the other, but not tank 5 mans or anything.
7-03-2008 @ 2:40PM
Kiyokko said...
I'm going to name my unicorn Charlie. :D
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7-03-2008 @ 4:39PM
Hurode said...
Mine's going to be Kidneythief.
7-03-2008 @ 6:04PM
Nick S said...
Candymtn
7-03-2008 @ 8:12PM
Unmei said...
Your 'tarded Kiyo.... >>
7-03-2008 @ 2:42PM
Hard8 said...
Great now Huntards can blow at Tanking & Healing as well as Trapping. (Not all Hunters, just the bad ones. You know who they are)
Reply
7-03-2008 @ 2:48PM
Shandriel of Ravenholt US said...
If I had a nickel everytime I tanked with a hunter that had Growl on....
If most of the DPS classes didn't alienate the tanking and healing communities (I play both, prot pally and holy/disc healer) then there wouldn't be a shortage of either one in the first place.
Go ahead though, I want to see how many hunters out there stick to tanking and possibly healing...they won't last beacuse they don't have the moxie to do it. That's why they rolled hunter's to begin with (that goes for the other DPS too).
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7-03-2008 @ 3:02PM
Dragoest said...
Amen !
( prot war & resto shammy )
7-03-2008 @ 3:55PM
Wolftech said...
As both a DPSer (mage) and a tank(Tankadin), the fact that there are not more is because healing and tanking are thankless jobs that take lots of skill as opposed to just pushing the pew pew button. The fact isn't that DPSers alienate the tanks and healers, but fact is there are far fewer of them to go around, and the bad ones tend to respec because they can not hack it.
7-03-2008 @ 4:26PM
Ircasha said...
If I had a nickel for every warrior I've seen that can't tank more than 2 mobs . . . first heal and two or three mobs head straight for the healer. All classes have players that suck.
If you had just reminded the hunter before you started the instance to turn off growl, all would have been well. When you're running with tanks who can't hold aggro, more often than not you've turned on growl to offtank something for the healer or another squishy and forgot to turn it off before the next pull.
7-03-2008 @ 4:45PM
Hurode said...
My main's a holy priest, I'm leveling a tankadin, and my lowest and possibly favorite character is a hunter. The first time I ever ran an instance with her (BFD at level 21), the tank mentioned I'd done a great job and was actually stunned when I said it was my first time dsoing anything but soloing as a hunter.
Knowing how to trap and when it's appropriate to use Growl (i.e. on bad pulls when the tank can't hold all the aggro) is one of the major differences between a bad hunter and a competent hunter, especially because so few of them seem to be the latter.
7-03-2008 @ 4:59PM
Zanzi said...
"If most of the DPS classes didn't alienate the tanking and healing communities...then there wouldn't be a shortage of either one in the first place."
Holy freaking cow! You guys have your own *communities*? Are they like secret societies with meetings and rituals conducted deep underground, far from the peering eyes of LFG? Perhaps in deep in the bowels of Gnomeregan since no one supposedly ever wants to go there?
Have you tanks and healers started a conspiracy to make it "look" like there's a tank shortage, when actually half of the tanks are secretly rolling Arms just for fun in your Tank-Healer-exclusive groups while the rogues up on the surface world sigh wistfully, scanning the horizon for someone to gank in their twitchy impatience and the nearby mages conjure up "just one more" drink to drown their sorrows?
Is there a plan in the works to leverage that supposed "tank shortage" to charge all DPSers a "tank tax" since tanks are so "low in supply" and repair costs are so "high"? (Not that we would know any better if repairs cost you nothing... for all we know, blacksmiths can repair their own armor.)
Please... tell me... is this tank tax going to start at 4g.20s-per-boss Azeroth-wide and going to rise by about 1g each year (month?) until we all go broke?
This could explain a lot...
;-)
7-04-2008 @ 1:40PM
Afu said...
Stereotypes are fun! Do some more. Do some more!
Ironic, considering the name of your server as well.
"C'mon guys, let's roll on the server named after a Rogue faction!"
7-03-2008 @ 2:53PM
CursedSeishi said...
greeaaat... now not only will i asked if i can heal or tank runs on my ret pallie, my poor hunter will be begged to as well! Thanks blizzard!!
I can just see the whispers...
"Hey, can u Unicorn-HoT our grup plz?!"
"Can u turtle-tnk plz?!"
Reply
7-03-2008 @ 2:56PM
Dave said...
Yeah, I know this is all in good fun... but there's no way I'm playing a game where hunters can actually tank or heal instances. I won't just quit being a tank and a healer (I have one of both AND a hunter myself) I'll just give up on the game because it'll be a joke.
(and the reason there aren't ever healers or tanks is because it's not necessarily fun! More people who CAN do something never ever means that more people will WANT to do it in the end, otherwise they'd be doing it now since there are 4 healing classes and soon to be 4 tanking classes.. so even IF you have "hunter tank" people... they'll probably all realize it kinda sucks and go back to standing around with auto shot and pet auto attack and laugh at all the people putting out effort in a 5-man)
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7-03-2008 @ 3:02PM
bill said...
This is possibly oen of blizz's dumbest ideas ever. If a BM hunter's pet could tank a 5 man then you wouldn't have a need for any tank classes until raid time...why would you take a prot war when you could get an extra cc/dps for their spot? It would just slow you down. And at raid time, you'd have anything but rusty and somewhat un-skilled tanks from not being able to get some practise in 5 mans.
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7-03-2008 @ 3:10PM
my2cents said...
Lol good to see that most (but apparently not all) people understood that this was a joke, at least partially. Yes hunters are getting "dps ,tank, and utility" talent trees, but there's so far no indication at all whatsoever that the end result will be pets that are any more powerful than they are so far...just more specialized and unique.
So for the few of you who didn't understand the humor of this blog, take a deep breath...it'll be ok =P
Reply
7-03-2008 @ 3:12PM
Ayva said...
Disregarding the obvious sarcasm in the piece, the idea of a tanking pet I find incredibly intriguing, and as one who has one character of all three types (healer, tank, and dps) I would be all for it.
Like BRK mentioned, how many times do we see LF tank, LF healer, or a combo of both? Tanks complain that they'd be out of a job, but you know what? Even with hunter pets tanking, i'm willing to bet there will still be a tank shortage. Why? Because no one actually likes tanking. Sure, there may be a few of you out there who take pride in being a great tank. I've tried my best to do so, but the amount of responsibility and unbelievable amount of criticism for every mistake makes me want to tank only in a blue moon, and only with people I know and trust. And the majority of people I've talked to have said the same thing.
So bring on the pet tanks! The more classes and people there are who realize what a b*itch tanking can be, the more people will appreciate the effort us tanks actually put into it, and it will make it more enjoyable for all of us.
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